So to start this off, I’m very disappointed and upset about this race so I’m sorry if this isn’t my normal peppy upbeat post. I just have to share with you guys and then I hope to never think of it again. I know I can’t keep beating myself up about it, but I literally cried about it yesterday. Sitting at my computer desk, tears rolling down my face, crying. It was bizarre, but I felt like it was a good cry and that helped me to not be so hard on myself. After that little preface, read on!
So the night before the race we had a little forum encounter from the Runners World Forums. It’s incredibly motivating to me to meet more runners and hear more stories. Everyone was so nice and it was a blast to meet more people that I ‘talk’ to daily on the forums.
So the day of the race I woke up feeling really good, like over the top good. I felt strong and ready to race. I picked up my cousin who was running the 5k and we were both ready to go and got amazing parking right off Main Street.
After she started her race, I went back to the car took a gu and got myself ready for my race. I jogged to the starting line and was feeling really good. I also got to meet up with P.O.M too before the race at the expo on Friday and we found each other in the throng of people. I got off to a great start and my first three miles were strong. At the three mile, I was at 23:16 and my pace was 7:46. I was feeling really good. I was running well and my feet weren’t hurting too bad. Around mile six the balls of my feet started to hurt a little bit.
Then mile seven came. I ate my gu and drank lots of water on the course. I was starting to feel my stomach cramp up and it was beginning to hurt around mile seven. This was when I felt like mile eight would never come. I kept looking for a sign and hoped that it was coming soon but I was so out of it and I knew if I lost my focus I would walk the remainder. For the first time I felt like giving up. I didn’t care. I didn’t want to keep going I didn’t want to run anymore I was so over it. It was really weird, I almost started crying and I was really upset at myself for having these feelings. I never want to quit, and I can run for so long normally but yesterday it just wasn’t in me.
For some reason mile eight seemed so far away. At 8.2 miles I was at 1:04:16 and my pace was 7:51, but I felt like I was sloshing along it wasn’t good and I was already upset with myself. There wasn’t much crowd support and the course was much different that I thought it was going to be. My mind was just not in the racing mode and my body was matching my mind. I felt like a slug.
This was when I found a guy and just ran with him. Sometimes when I try to run with other guys I feel like they are intimidated and speed up a little bit because they don’t want to get ‘chicked’. He didn’t leave me though and he didn’t seem to mind either, who knows what he really was thinking though. He was a little bit taller than me, wearing a gray tank top and had sleeves of tattoos. He was wearing a beanie and when my music was soft I could hear his. I ran next to him for the next 3.5 miles. I must have been super annoying but I knew if I didn’t give myself a goal like staying with someone that I would just sputter out and be done.
I started out with a long sleeve tee and took that off around mile 3 and had to carry it with me until mile 9 when I think I saw Mr. R and tossed it at him. I was so upset with myself at the time I couldn’t believe what I was doing. I felt like my paces were so far off and I was just having a horrible day. Finally mile 10 and 11 passed. This was when I knew it was almost over. I knew it was soon going to be done so that gave me a little bit of hope. I was still running with tattoo man and then I saw Charlie Pro. Without him I would of been a complete meltdown.
He ran with me (after finishing second in the 5k for his age group running 18 something. Crazy! I know) and told me that I was looking great. His friend Kevin got me all the water I needed and kept me right on pace. They told me when to kick before the finish and told me to be strong and steady. Keep the even pace. The balls of my feet were just killing me and I just wanted the race to be over. I hadn’t seen anyone I knew besides Mr. R at Mile 9 and I was so, so grumpy. Charlie and Kevin helped me get to the finish line and I seriously owe everything to them. I crossed the finish line and stopped my watch. 1:45:58. Sweet, I had done it.
Then I checked the times later online at home. The website said 1:46:00. I literally started bawling. I felt like after all that, could I really hit 1:46:00 on the dot? Seriously website. I am disappointed in you. Other than that! Gosh, I feel like that was such a rant and I’m sorry. Not every race is going to be great and I am glad that I of course finished the race. I am incredibly sore today, and still in a glum mood about the race. I watched so many of the finishers in the marathon and I did get a little bit excited because I know soon that I will be able to say that I also have ran a marathon.
I’m taking today off and going to try to go for a little jog tomorrow to see how my body feels. I’ll probably cry about the race once more and then be over it. I’m looking forward to getting my mileage up and running some fun races now for a little bit. I’m looking forward to marathon training and being able to complete a full marathon and enjoy it.
Congrats to Sara who qualified for Boston. When she crossed the finish line I almost cried. I am an emotional mess lately!
Women: 248 out of 6513
F 18-24: 29 out of 536
Age/Grade: 62.12% Place: 1018
Finish: 1:46:00 Pace: 8:06
Tag Time: 1:46:00
Gun Time: 1:47:08
And on a completly unrelated and happy note, TOMORROW I’M GOING TO BE POSTING ABOUT MY GIVEAWAY! Hooray! :)